DeeEl's Mo Chroí Scríofa

Appropriate Behavior

I have actually been thinking about this post for a couple days.  Then this morning, CBS’ Sunday Morning ran a piece about the same issue.  They focused on TMZ and how they get all the celebrity news faster than anyone else.  Looks like TMZ beat me to the story this time, too.  I am not really into following celebrities.  I don’t really care much in knowing what they had for breakfast (not that many of them eat breakfast).  I think all that gossip is just a trivial waist of time.  However, it seems that more and more these celebs have been invading my news.  I have been quite over the oil spill in the gulf and wish they would find something else to report on.  Then along comes a news story about a celebrity getting arrested, filing for divorce or misbehaving in some way.

August 31, 1997 I was watching television before going to bed when my program was interrupted.  They reported that there had been a car accident in France involving Princess Diana.   I had come to admire this woman and sat watching in wonder.  The last reported before I went to bed was that the princess suffered a broken arm and was sent to the hospital.  I felt sure she would be fine and went to bed.  When I arose the next morning and turned on the news, I learned of the complete tragedy.  Princess Diana was dead.  Through the months following I learned of the chase her car was put through by the paparazzi and blamed them for her death.  It really brought to light what reporters and photographers will do to get a story, even cause the death of a kind and generous lady like the princess.  If I want to be that intimately involved in someone’s life, I will marry them.  This is the main reason I don’t go in for all the celebrity gossip.  People have a right to their privacy, let them have it.

This post is not about that kind of gossip people seem to thrive on.  I saw last week when Lindsey Lohan went to court and was sentenced to 90 days jail time.  The experts stated that she will probably only do 30 days and in solitary confinement at that.  More and more celebrities are behaving badly and expecting not to have to answer for their misdeeds.  Mel Gibson has once again ticked someone off.  Personally I didn’t think there was anyone left for him to tick off.  Now he has charges pending once again.  Will he answer for this?  I doubt it.  Being a celebrity seems to give a person a get out of jail free card.  they are allowed to behave as badly as they like and then they don’t have to pay.  Had that been a regular citizen in that courtroom last week, they would have been hauled off to jail straight-away and put into general population for the entire 90 days.  However, Ms. Lohan went home and planned how she was going to party that night for her birthday.

I was raised to respect other people and especially authority.  Even back then the celebrities didn’t get out of line that badly.  Our local celebrities seem to think they can behave how they wish and not have to face consequences.  With previous football coaches I have seen some of the UT VOLs go out and break the law, get arrested and nothing happen to them on the team or in school, even if they broke the law on campus.  Now there is a coach who does things differently.  He believes the “stars” of the field should be good examples on the field and off.  Recently a few team members were involved in a barroom brawl and were arrested.  One has been expelled from the team and the other were suspended indefinitely.  I have not been a VOL fan in the past, but to this coach I lift my glass.

Celebrities, no matter who they are nor how much they are worth, should be afforded the same rights as the rest of the population.  No special treatment, no solitary confinement.  Give them what anyone else would get.  The new appropriate behavior for our role models in the US is misbehavior.  Just like burning Lebron’s tee shirts fed his narcissism, allowing celebrities to get away with anti-social behavior shows them that they can get away with what they do as well.  And they will continue to be the ill model of behavior for our children and teens until we show them we will not tolerate it any longer.

Change Isn’t Always A Good Thing

You know you have gone off the deep end when you tell the employees at Hardee’s they are a bunch of plebeians.  You heard me right, I called them plebeians.  I went to the drive-thru before going west to check my mail and get a few parcels of groceries.  When I got to the window and received my bag, I checked it as I always do.  Biscuit with egg, cheese and tomato.  However, there were no napkins in the bag.  Usually they put ten napkins for each sandwich.  I waited for the girl to return to the window and asked for napkins and she replied, “We are all out of napkins.  They are being unloaded right now in the back.”  I looked at her in disbelief and handed the bag back to her and advised I could not eat that unless I had napkins.  She couldn’t seem to understand what napkins have to do with eating a greasy sandwich.  She snatched the bag wondering what to do and I asked if they were all plebeians and do not use napkins to wipe their hands and mouth when eating.  She took my bag and gave it to someone to return my money.  That person returned my bag with some paper-towels.  While I waited, I noticed the tables by the window just ahead of me had full napkin dispensers.  This roused me even more.  Why tell me they are completely out of napkins, when in fact they are not?  How much trouble is it to go into a virtually empty dinning area and taking some of the napkins for use in another area until supplies are unpacked?

I know you are wondering what this little tale has to do with the title of this post.  A lot.  Back in my grandmother’s day it was called “the change”.  The more accurate name is menopause.  A number of years ago, my best friend, Sissy (rest her soul) went through the change.  No one could live with her.  Her husband, daughter and even I avoided her most of the time.  Her mood swings were so bad that one time she even bragged to me about calling the secretary of her church a B****.  Sissy, like me,  never cussed.   This was strange for me to comprehend.  Those close to her finally figured out what was going on with her.  While we still avoided her a good deal, we tried to be more understanding.  This prompted me to have a bit of a conversation with my aunt.  I asked her (I am very naive) if she had been through the change yet.  After she stopped laughing she affirmed that she had.  I told her about Sissy and inquired as to the symptoms my aunt had.  She said all she had was hot flashes.

About a year or so ago I began noticing definite changes in my menses.  In the last few months I have noticed my demeanor changing.  I get upset and even angry faster.  I am still good at holding my tongue, excepting this morning.  I keep everything inside and don’t tell people what I truly feel.  I figured this change was due to Meniere’s and the way it has been treating me of late.  I also attributed my change to loneliness as I do not have interactions with people on a regular basis.  This mornings display gave me pause and I took the drive out west to try to consider what was going on with me.  Hot flashes and night sweats have been with me intermittently for a while now.

I once had someone describe menopause to me as one minute you have your head in the freezer and the next in the oven.  I thought she was joking.   Women are just now being overtly educated regarding this change.  When I was growing up it was still a bit of a taboo subject that everyone knew about, but did not speak of, especially in polite company.  Now it is all over the television, radio, movies and print media.  There are pills you can take to supposedly help lessen the severity of the symptoms of menopause.  More drugs.  Seems there is a pill for just about everything these days.  I am, as my GYN says, pre-menopausal.  I suppose things will get worse as I continue into the change.  Until I am safely on the other side of this, I will do all within my power to continue to hold my tongue and keep a fan nearby.  However, if, on the rare occasion, I slip and call you a plebeian, please try to be understanding and know that it is not how I honestly feel.  It will be the hormones going crazy within.